The Englishman, the Scotsman and the Irishman
Pre-teaching vocabulary.
1. a construction site (noun)
2. For God's Sake! (phrase)
3. splat (noun, informal)
4. a widow (noun)
5. a memorial service (noun)
2. For God's Sake! (phrase)
3. splat (noun, informal)
4. a widow (noun)
5. a memorial service (noun)
- a piece of land on which a house or other building is being built
- This phrase is used to express annoyance or impatience, or to add force to a question or request.
- the sound of something wet hitting a surface
- a woman whose husband has died and who has not married againsurface
- a ceremony remembering and honoring a person who has died
1. a construction site (noun)
a piece of land on which a house or other building is being built
2. For God's Sake! (phrase)
This phrase is used to express annoyance or impatience, or to add force to a question or request.
3. splat (noun, informal)
the sound of something wet hitting a surface
4. a widow (noun)
a woman whose husband has died and who has not married again
5. a memorial service (noun)
a ceremony remembering and honoring a person who has died
Read the story. Can you complete the last sentence of the story?
An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman are all working on a construction site, building a new skyscraper in London. It's lunchtime and they're all sitting at the top of the building. The Englishman opens up his lunchbox to see what his wife has packed him.
"Ugh… Ham and cheese sandwich… again. I'm sick of ham and cheese sandwiches, it's the same every bloody day. If I get another ham and cheese sandwich in my lunch box tomorrow, I'll jump off the top of this building."
Next, the Scotsman opens up his lunch box. "Aackk, jam sandwich… again. I cannee go on like this eating jam sandwiches every day of my life! If I get the same again tomorrow I'll jump as well."
Next it's the Irishman's turn. "Ohh for God's sake! Not another egg and cress sandwich! That's the fourth one in a row this week! I'm with you boys, one more egg and cress sandwich and I'll jump!"
So next day they sit at the top of the building to have lunch. One by one they open up their lunch boxes… Englishman finds another ham and cheese sandwich, so off he jumps, and splats into the ground below. Scotsman finds another jam sandwich… Off he goes…Splat. Irishman, egg and cress sandwich… Splat.
A week or so later the three widows are talking at the memorial service. English widow says, through tears, "I still can't believe it, had no idea George hated ham and cheese so much, if only I'd known…"
Scottish widow says "Duncan did say he was getting a bit bored of jam, but I didn't realize he hated it that much, I just wish he'd let me know how he really felt."
Irish widow says "I… I just don't understand… Paddy _________________________________".
"Ugh… Ham and cheese sandwich… again. I'm sick of ham and cheese sandwiches, it's the same every bloody day. If I get another ham and cheese sandwich in my lunch box tomorrow, I'll jump off the top of this building."
Next, the Scotsman opens up his lunch box. "Aackk, jam sandwich… again. I cannee go on like this eating jam sandwiches every day of my life! If I get the same again tomorrow I'll jump as well."
Next it's the Irishman's turn. "Ohh for God's sake! Not another egg and cress sandwich! That's the fourth one in a row this week! I'm with you boys, one more egg and cress sandwich and I'll jump!"
So next day they sit at the top of the building to have lunch. One by one they open up their lunch boxes… Englishman finds another ham and cheese sandwich, so off he jumps, and splats into the ground below. Scotsman finds another jam sandwich… Off he goes…Splat. Irishman, egg and cress sandwich… Splat.
A week or so later the three widows are talking at the memorial service. English widow says, through tears, "I still can't believe it, had no idea George hated ham and cheese so much, if only I'd known…"
Scottish widow says "Duncan did say he was getting a bit bored of jam, but I didn't realize he hated it that much, I just wish he'd let me know how he really felt."
Irish widow says "I… I just don't understand… Paddy _________________________________".
packed his own lunch
